on the Verge of

I haven't posted any blog for a while. I've been trying to post more in my FB page but the recent craziness in the world has made it difficult for me to find time write here. At least for now, I can make a short post. So, how are you? The recent Covid-19 pandemic has sent the countries around the world in health emergencies and lockdowns. Despite many speculations of the virus' origin, the primary concern right now is how to combat the virus and save lives. And while it seems that those who are not directly infected by it are eager to stay at home, it's no easy feat. That is why I am writing and asking "How are you?". Truth is, staying at home for long periods of time is mentally stressful. We've been used to a routine in life like going to work, eating out, meeting with family or friends and many others. But the recent disruptions to this cycle have thrown our lives in chaos. There is tension in the air, panic buying everywhere, complaints here an...

I came across this quote and I immediately fell in love with it. It aptly describes how I felt back when I met my husband in Cebu four years ago. It's also very timely as Valentine's day is approaching. It's about taking chances in love even if there's a possibility of getting hurt, taking a risk despite the uncertainties that come with it. And in taking that chance and its risks, we find meaning and even perhaps love. To those who have fell in love and got hurt again and again, it's no easy feat. But if we can be open to love again, no matter how scary the possibility of being brokenhearted is, the fact we took the chance once more means we will never give up searching for the right person. And in my experience, along with those I knew who waited for quite a long time, God hears our prayers.

January has been a roller-coaster month, not only for me, but for a lot of people I know as well. We've been through some rough times due to the Taal eruption and corona virus scare. Kobe was not my primary sports idol, but his death sent me and everyone else a huge wave of sadness. My worst for the month was probably the loss of a friend, my dear Kurt, due to cancer. Despite the heartbreaks of January, I am still thankful for the many beautiful moments and reunions it brought me. I was able to get a medical clearance to go back to work and travel. I was able to see my friends and colleagues again, catching up with some gatherings that I missed last holiday season. It's also been a very busy month at work. I haven't really been able to catch up on everything and I feel like I have been asking the same things from before. But I am thankful for all the support and understanding from everyone. I feel blessed to be able to work and be more active again. It's been to...

Today, I was able to finally visit the shrine of the Divine Mercy at El Salvador City. I have been meaning to visit since last year but it was only today that I finally had the opportunity to go. Aside from lighting a candle and saying my prayers, I was able to drink the said miraculous water of the shrine. But instead of taking bottles of water like many others, I only took a sip at the fountain. It was not because I did not believe that it would completely heal me, but because I remembered the sick woman who touched Jesus' cloak (Luke 8:43-49). She knew in her heart that if she could only touch Him, even if it were only the edge of His cloak, she would be healed. She knew that it was all she needed. And Jesus said to her, "...your faith has healed you." And so I only took a sip, knowing that it was all I needed for my soul. The water tasted like home. In my heart I know, God has touched me as well. At the foot of the statue of Divine Mercy 

Today I had my follow up check-up a month after my radioactive iodine. I finally got a clearance to go back to work and travel :) But the battle isn't over. As my doctors explained, we have yet to learn the extent of the treatment's effectiveness 6 months after I underwent it. We've done everything that we can and could only pray for the best. Some of my tests were not within the expected range so I am under monitoring. But right now, it's time to move on. If you haven't read my previous blog about my condition, you can read it here . Papillary Carcinoma may be one of the most treatable cancers, but it is what it is. Sometimes the worse scenarios play in my head and I try my best to be practical about it. Sometimes we try to prepare ourselves for anything that could happen. But nothing can really prepare us from the possibilities of permanently losing our voice, or being disabled, or for simply leaving too soon. Like what I said, we've done everything we...

Last Jan 1, Keen and I were able to break free from our 2019 resolution of 'No Beer for the Year.' As we drank our first bottle of ice-cold beer for over a year, we discussed our possible joint resolutions this 2020. There were some suggestions like 'no softdrinks for the year' and 'no meals after 6pm' which were certainly a whole level of difficulty for me and even for Keen. We learned our lesson last 2018 that we shouldn't make unfeasible resolutions that we cannot follow through for the rest of the year. And so after finishing a bottle or two and making some final negotiations, this is our final 2020 resolution: to reach 50 and 60 kilos for me and Keen respectively by the end of the year! It's definitely more challenging for me since I was the one who gained a significant amount of weight during my medical situation last quarter. Nonetheless, I'm enthusiastic about it as I need to be healthier and I want to feel more confident about...

The second decade of the third millennium is about to end. Ten years ago, I never would have guessed that I would be where I am right now. I've had a lot of heartbreaks along the way, definitely did some terrible mistakes as well. But I would not be who I am today if I haven't been through those embarrassing and painful moments. Despite all my previous medical dilemmas, my knee surgery and thyrodectomy, I'm just thankful to be alive and well. I'm thankful that I still get to experience life, that I can still breath well and hear the birds chirp outside my window, that I can still spend time with the people I value and love most. Ten years ago I was only 18, naive but full of hope. I had declared my dreams and how to achieve them. A few years passed then and I was past my deadlines of becoming a manager and being married. Nonetheless, I reached those goals a few years later, not because I was pressured by my overdue deadlines, but because I was ready. And only God ...